I notice when my body shifts I can feel the tendons tighten under my skin. I practiced perfection, I thought I could polish the pain to form connection. I started becoming a witness, living in liminality. I live like a live wire— unpredictable as a summer rain. I don't hold onto the shame distance carries, though I know not all pain is temporary. I feel like I’m at the edge of existence. Left foot social, right foot unapproachable the Hokey Pokey of disability.